We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Randomize
