Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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