So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
