so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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