Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Life without a bra equals bliss.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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