I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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