i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize