My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
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