if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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