Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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