Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I licked your asshole in confidence.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
