I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
