i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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