..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
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