Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(541): View more from Oregon

This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.

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(607): View more from New York

no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.

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(905): View more from Ontario

Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....

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(702): View more from Nevada

This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag

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(586): View more from Michigan

Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?

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(972): View more from Texas

His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.

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