im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
only you would photoshop your dick
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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