You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize