Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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