you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Randomize
