Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
