Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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