sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
