don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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