He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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