I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
