I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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