just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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