I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize
