I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
