I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
