We're like a lot better than the average bears
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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