The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Randomize
