Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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