It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
