Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
