Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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