I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I came so hard my ears popped.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
