as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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