508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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