Cold hands, warm shart.
I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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