this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
