I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize
