so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
