Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
