first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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