Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
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