When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
this is an emotional support booty call
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