My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I went to an adult Halloween party last night dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, but I woke up on a stranger's couch surrounded by sleeping children in karate gi's. And I accidentally flushed my granny wig mid-puke, so if they wake up I'm gonna have to convince them that I'm just a weird older man and not a terrible cross dresser.
How did you come to this point in your life?
Good bartenders.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
