I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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