I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
