At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
