You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
