He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
