its not stalking. its research.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
